The Spurious Nib

Friday, April 7, 2017

Spurious Histories

And now for some spurious historical events...

In 1930 Crisco tried to help the country out of the Great Depression by marketing, "Sunny-Side-Up Eggs-In-A-Can."

In 1895 Gertrude Flimheiser won the Golden Birler Shoe award after wetting all 10 of her opponents in Milwaukee's 10th Annual Women's Beer Barrel Rolling contest.

On this day in 1919, the Monty brothers collected three quarters, a tin whistle, a cigar butt and a brass button after begging on Forty Second street in New York City whilst standing on a phone book.

On August 20, 1905, Thomas Pertwith realized every time he walked with his gal, Betty, he thought of beer. On August 21, 1905 Thomas asked for Betty's hand in marriage.

Tuesday, April 4, 2017

Spurious Scholars Discover.......

Scholars have discovered why children develop a fear of math. Psyches have been damaged so much by this horrific discovery that people actually forget being subjected to this didactic method.

Baggy the Binomial Clown (he used to work with Tingles the Triangle), has been used by math teachers for years to help our children learn basic math skills.
Baggy's favorite gag is to ask a child to, “look into the Face of a Polyhedron.” When the child leans towards the Face Baggy squirts them with water, and then Baggy yells, “That's a Lateral Face!!”

Saturday, April 1, 2017

April 1st

Spurious Movie Fact

Friday, March 31, 2017

The Spurious Nib

Volume 14

Spurious Nib #68

German pugilist, Holzerei Kampf, known as the Big Strudel, once challenged English, heavy weight champion, Henry Alger Arthur to box on the Rhein. After the Big Strudel taunted Arthur, “ das ist mein Schnitzel,” Arthur agreed to fight.

Spurious Nib #38

Billy Buskey, local hero, and shoe tycoon, had one failed invention. After his pet duck’s feet were found froze into the birdbath Billy invented 'Doots'. These were specifically made boots that kept his pet duck Randy's feet warm.

Spurious Nib #102

Raisin Boy!

Gustav Sinclair's family was so wealthy that they indulged his obsession with raisins by giving him a raisin bread bed and matching pillow.

Spurious Nib #56

In 1920 the Dyspepsia Publishing Company began printing, The Journal of Random Responses for Introverts.

Spurious Nib #7

In 958AD Garrick Dimmock started beating a drum all day. Garrick would not work. Garrick would not play. Garrick only wanted to beat the drum all day.

One day early in 959AD Garrick Dimmock's entire village voted to take away his drum.