Report filed by Dr. Mayer Windfeller.
Whilst many of you have been fretting about the current particularities of quarantines in 2020. The Spurious Nib will endeavor to prevaricate upon the unknown origins of “social distancing” that may or may not have assisted the promulgators of your time to conserve what is left of your world.
March 30, 1889. Andrew Tetramov finished creating a grotto on Mount Dzyarzhynskaya as a refuge from the “plague of humanity with their chin wagging confabulations gathering about town to discuss all manner of politics, religion, and flummery!”
April 1, 1903. 7AM. Clyde Chubb discovered the amazing health benefits of his home made “Seclusion Box.”
April 1, 1903. 11:22AM. Clyde Chubb discovered his “Seclusion Box” has been enjoyed by the entire Chubb clan.
April 2, 1921. Misanthrope, Hettie Bender discovered, “the look” availed her the solitude she had always longed for.
April 3, 1918. In an effort to thwart the Encephalitis Lethargica quarantine Billy Gueck walked the telegraph lines from Inguadona, Minnesota to Longville, Minnesota in order to buy a box of cigars.
