Saturday, February 1, 2020

Spurious Groundhog’s Day 2020

Will the groundhog see his shadow and doom humanity to six more weeks of winter? 
In honor of Groundhog’s Day The Spurious Nib would like to remind you of other things that indicate six more weeks...


Where upon a French painter deigns to agree on your portraiture
 it will take six more weeks before he lays 
the first brush stroke to canvas.

When Charles Pardon learned his wife purchased a piano 
it meant six more weeks of a migraine headache.

Some spurious employees at the Basilica of St. Paul claim it takes four weeks to wax the floors from the east entrance to the west exit and then six more weeks to wax the floors from west to east!


Whenever Harland Peddywhomper notices the washboard 
approach the top of his head he knew it meant 
sleeping in the hospital for six more weeks.

When Slovaks in Tuzla, Yugoslavia began fermenting potatoes they knew it would be six more weeks before they would have vodka.

And sixthly
If a farmer sees a groundhog it means 
six more weeks until he can give his wife a fur hat.

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